New delivery by Exotic Erotics on it’s way

A new delivery of Dildos by Exotic Erotics (English / German) is on it’s way.

We expect it to arrive in about 10 business days (including customs). Then we just have to count, label and sort it for the new stock to be available in our shop (English Shop / German Shop). When that happend, we’ll report here again, so you can place your orders on items that are curretly still out of stock.   If you want to track this delivery, you can do so here and here.

Custom Dildos:
For just a few days after this delivery arrived and before we place our next order right away, it will be possible to order custom variation again. Just contact us via email, stating all the details like colour and firmnes. Then we’ll provide you with a custom product that can be ordered exactly 1 time via the regular ordering process. The only  difference is that it obviously takes longer to ship and we require it to be fully payed right away. Also for custom made products there is no 14 day return period.

(Yes, postings in the category „Disturbing Dildo Deliveries“ are basically copy&pasted.
There is just nothing original to write about such a thing but many people are waiting
for toys of a specific manufacturer to come in, so it’s important we post these.)

Email and tracking improvements

A lot of custiom and highly specialized PHP coding happened last night and this morning.

Improved Emails

We have fixed a mistake in certain automatic emails, where the adresses would not be shown. Sadly we don’t ever get to see the emails our shop sends out (they don’t end up in our „sent“ folder or something), so this was not noticed earlier.

More importantly, the shipping emails now include the tracking numbers and they are even clickable. (A custom functionality the shop software doesn’t offer by default despite having tracking links in the administrative user interface.)

Improved Postage Labels

Also due to a bug some postage labels would include the name of the shop.
This has been fixed right away after it has come to our attention.

Improved Administrative tools

We also changed some parts of the administrative user interface so allow status updates on an entire group of orders (e.g. orders that have been shipped or that have been printed for shipping) instead of opening each of these orders individually.

That doesn’t sound like much but it does save considerable time and removes repetitive tasks.

Zetacreation restocked

The announced delivery of Dildos by Zetacreations (English / German) arrived.

The new stock to is already available in our shop.
Except for the Grand Pup all toys made by Zetacreations are back in stock.
Note that with Zeta we do NOT offer the option to order custom toys because of the rather long waiting times until an order becomes a delivery.

(Yes, postings in the category „Disturbing Dildo Deliveries“ are basically copy&pasted.
There is just nothing original to write about such a thing but many people are waiting
for toys of a specific manufacturer to come in, so it’s important we post these.)

Credit Card temporary workaround

The current version of the credit card checkout page experienced technical difficulties and we shut it down last week.
SEPA bank transfers and Paypal of cause are unaffected and work perfectly fine.

Our regular credit card processor is still very slow to provide us with the needed account data to set up their new generation of checkout pages. This migration would be needed anyway to support the mandatory „3D secure II“ later this year. However they didn’t plan for customers to asl for the migration before the start of May.

In the mean time we have set up with another provider to keep accepting credit cards until this is over. We already received the first orders with it. No issues so far. Selling dildos is perfectly fine by the very letter of their T&S but it may stil show that they interprete their own terms rather loosely and we’ll have to give up this temporary workaround. As long as they do the payouts, we’re fine.

We are also investigating Amazon Pay. However we need to clarify in writing if they allow us. „product similar to erotic services“ (erotics being depictions of humans and services being different from products) are not allowed and we need to know in writing if this does or does not mean sex toys.

Sidewinder restocked

We got a medium sized delivery from Sidewinder Creations (English / German).

Most toys are back in stock now.

Exceptions are the large Cassie and the large Spikey.

We are planning to add completely new toy models with our next order.

Credit card trouble

Multiple customers have reported issues with credit cards and our payment provider wants everyone to migrate to a new system anyway due to „3D Secure 2“ being rolled out.

Until the credit card provider can solve the issues, we have temporarily disabled credit card payments. Paypal still works fine.


A Very special Easter Egg

Many of you liked the Dragon Egg by Bad Wolf but mentioned that you would like a larger one.
So in time for Easter, here it is:

The Dragon Egg (Large)

The Dragon Egg (Large) is is a hunk made from half a kilogramm of the finest silicone with a usable length increased to 14cm and a hunking 24.5cm or 9.6″ in diameter.

Attribute maintenance

It’s a rainy day and we had too much coffee….

So we updated several hundred products with new „species“ attributes, searchable and comparable values for „length“ and „usable length“. The new comparable „maximum diameter“ attribute. Images that got broken or gone missing. More categories allow dynmic filtering, …

A ton of boring cleanup work, so you can make the most out of the advanced search, the ability to dynamically filter the product lists in large categories and to select products to compare them side by side.

Size category rules

We also defined objective rules for our 5 size categories.
Based on usable length with exceptions for unusual and extreme knots.
Tiny =  usable length 13cm or less and no excessive knots
Mini = usable length 17cm or less and no unusualy thickness
Regular = usable length 26cm or less and <8cm thickness
Large = usable length 40cm or less and <9cm thickness
Extra Large = everything larger
We do not apply the same rules within the „Canines“ and „Equines“ category. Simply because horses are usually quite large already and it would lead to very biased subcategories of Horses and of Canines

Within the canines, the medium sizes is everything from 16-20cm of usable length.
Within the equines, the medium sizes is everything from 20-29cm of usable length.


Sadly the software does not allow selecting ranges of numerical values when searching for size values or when using the dynamic filters. That feature is only supported for the attribute type „price“. Sorry. We’re keeping our eyes open for a plugin that adds this missing feature.